Planning for Halloween:

So I'm not sure if I've mentioned my Halloween costume yet....

This is a BIG DEAL for me, because this is the first year I'm dressing up since MIDDLE SCHOOL. I generally HATE halloween. I hate skanks. And that's what Halloween is. Skanks parading around in very little clothing.

But this year is different. Some of my nearest and dearest gays are dressing up as Miss America contestants, and I was invited to join.

The text of the original e-mail:

Fellow Miss America Contestants:

 

You're receiving this email because you have been crowned as the pageant winner for your respective state at one time or another throughout our 90 years and was in the running to be chosen Miss America and wear the famous four-pointed crown. The four points of the crown stand for Service, Style, Scholarship, and Success

(yes, I have been very productive at work today)

So, here is the rundown I need to know the following from you:

 

PLEASE RESPOND

State:

Year of Entry:

Sash option: (homemade/original)

crown option: (Original/Cheap Alt/no crown)

 

Let me know if there is anyone that I didnt send this email to that is participating because clearly the best way for this to work and us not look like random washed up trannies is for all of the contestants to have the same look & feel.  If you're a multiple state representative thats fine because your year and your "look" will differentiate you. (ie. Miss Wisconsin's) My long sleeve blackvelvet gown and big curly brown hair will represent Miss Ohio 1988 quite well.

 I just couldn't turn this down. 7 gay guys and me, in gowns. With sashes and tiaras. Should be hilarious. And if I'm not the best looking beauty queen, I'm going to off myself. (seriously).  And of course, I am going as Miss Texas 2010.

Brad, the ringleader, is taking his costume pretty seriously. And by pretty seriously I mean I don't even want to discuss the amount of time and money he has put in to it. (one of the advantages of this costume for me - I just had to buy a tiara and a sash. I already have makeup, long hair, shoes, etc. The guys are having to buy alllll this stuff). I will be purchasing a bumpit though. I MUST have Big Texas Hair!

This morning Brad and I were discussing undergarments. Because every beauty queen (Miss Ohio in Brad's case), needs proper slimming gear to look her best. 

I'm sharing the gchat with you (hope my dear friend Miss Ohio doesn't mind!)

Brad: so should i go with the L or XL spanx? it says dress size 10-12 for L but those measurements are closer to mine, but i think i was a 13-14 dress

 me: i think 10-12 si fine

  L

  bc you're not hippy

  like women are

 Brad: LD

 me: and you don't have a fat ass

  like women do

11:58 AM Brad: will i be able to breath in this thing

 me: no.

  lol

  also

  you don't really need spanx

  you can just get regular hose

  go to walgreens and just get a control top pair

  spanx are expensive

 Brad: shapers?

11:59 AM lol im going to get this

  http://www.spanx.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3053554&cp=2992553.3026774&parentPage=family

 me: lol

12:00 PM [dude] has a serious new york acceent

12:01 PM i'm gonna have to take him to texas

  and break him of it

12:02 PM Brad: lol big ol texas howdy

  http://www.target.com/Beyond-Barely-There-Hi-Waist-Shaping/dp/B003A46ECG/ref=br_1_28?ie=UTF8&node=293487011&sessionID=183-0203235-3733669&searchSize=30&searchView=grid3&searchPage=1&sr=1-28&qid=1287766861&rh=&searchBinNameList=style_name%2Ctarget_com_size-bin%2Ctarget_com_primary_color-bin%2Cprice%2Ctarget_com_brand-bin&searchRank=salesrank&frombrowse=1

  what about these

12:03 PM me: lol

  those are fine

  i like the ones with legs

  that are like compression shorts

  so you don't get wedgies

  and so my thighs don't rub together

  obviously you're not worried about your thighs

  but

12:04 PM http://www.spanx.com/product/index.jsp?productId=4483810&cp=2992553.4033382&parentPage=family

 Brad: well i like those too, but my issue was peeing

 me: lol

 Brad: and this way i can just pull it to the side

  lol

12:05 PM me: lol

 Brad: ugh the target one online only comes in white

12:06 PM me: haha

  if i were you

  i would jsut get regular pantyhose

  control top

  that way you don't have to shave your legs

 Brad: i already got my hose

 me: oh

12:07 PM well you def. don't need spanx and hose

  it's a one or the other thing

  you don't wear them together

 Brad: well thats why i was going to wear that undies one that goes up and then my hose over it bc they barely go up to my crotch as it is

 me: lol

  well then you didn't get big enough hose

12:08 PM Brad: it was plus girl size

 me: lol

 Brad: they dont make them for 6'

  2

 me: lol

  i bet they do

12:09 PM Brad: well not at beatnix where i bought the damn hose

 me: lol

5 minutes

12:14 PM me: http://www.target.com/ASSETS-Sara-Blakely-Perfect-Pantyhose/dp/B000CRDC24/ref=br_1_9?ie=UTF8&node=86318011&sessionID=181-3814062-4390542&searchSize=30&searchView=grid3&searchPage=1&sr=1-9&qid=1287767547&rh=&searchBinNameList=style_name,target_com_size-bin,target_com_primary_color-bin,price,target_com_brand-bin&searchRank=salesrank&frombrowse=1

  assets is target brand spanx

  they're just as good as spanx

12:15 PM http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/2794829?origin=category&resultback=202

12:16 PM Brad: those arent the undies version i cant have the shorts

I can't WAIT to show you guys pictures!!!